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Signs of an Abusive Relationship

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Signs of an Abusive Relationship

The following are some of the typical traits of an abusive domestic partner:

Dominance — Abusive individuals need to feel in charge of the relationship. They will make decisions for you and the family, tell you what to do, and expect you to obey without question. Your abuser may treat you like a servant, child, or even a possession.
Humiliation —Abusers do everything they can to make you feel bad about yourself, or defective in some way. This is because if you believe that you are worthless and that no one else will want you, you are less likely to leave. Insults, name-calling, shaming, and public put-downs are all weapons of abuse designed to break down your self-esteem and make you feel powerless.
Isolation — In order to increase your dependence, abusive partnera will cut you off from the outside world. They may keep you from seeing family or friends, or even prevent you from going to work or school. They may require you to ask permission to do anything, go anywhere, or see anyone.
Threats — Abusers commonly use threats to keep their victims from leaving or to scare them into dropping charges. Abusers may threaten to hurt or kill you, your children, other family members, or even pets. They may also threaten to commit suicide, file false charges against you, or report you to child services.
Intimidation —Abusers use a variety of intimation tactics designed to scare you into submission. These tactics include making threatening looks or gestures, smashing things in front of you, destroying property, hurting pets, or putting weapons on display.
Denial and blame — Abusers are very good at making excuses for the inexcusable. They blame their abusive and violent behavior on a bad childhood, a bad day, and even on the victims of their abuse. Abusers minimize the abuse or deny that it occurred. They commonly shift the responsibility onto you: Somehow, their violence and abuse is your fault.

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